The Deed is Done :(

Today I brought Boon to our animal shelter. I had posted an ad for him on the online classifieds, but once I decided he had to go, I had to do it as soon as possible so the kids couldn't talk me out of it. Last Saturday he had gotten off his line--again--and was in someone's yard jumping up at her kids and freaking out their dogs and just wouldn't go away. She tried calling me once she learned it was my dog, but I was away. I didn't find out about the specifics until today. Anyway, it's just happened one too many times and I can't have it on my conscience that my dog is over in someone else's yard driving them crazy and causing them to be unhappy. And unfortunately, Boon can occasionally manage to get off his line, not to mention the times when Goose inadvertantly lets him out of the house. The three middle kids have taken it badly--Janey and T-Bone came with me to the animal shelter to say good-bye and it was hard to hear them crying. It's probably the hardest to have my sweet and tender most middle child be sad. The dumb dog just needs a good fence, and we don't have one. While I was at the shelter, someone called from the add (of course). She called back later and I told her that he was at the shelter and she sounded interested enough that she will probably go down and at least check him out.
I felt so cold about the whole process; I wasn't even sad as I signed the papers and shut him up in the kennel, I just knew it had to be done. It makes me a little sad now; he is a sweet, cute dog. But we just didn't have what he needed. On that cold November night when we got him 16 months ago, I had a little voice say to me that this would be a mistake. But we had gone too far and I didn't want to disappoint the kids. So know instead of disappointing them, I've devastated them. I don't think any of them were truly attached to him the way some people love their dogs, but they liked him enough that the feel the lack of him.
I hate being a mean mom.